How Do You Get Your Husband To Lose Weight Without hurting Him

Many wives struggle with their husband’s weight gain over time. While most women mean well, broaching the topic tactfully can take a lot of work. Your husband is likely sensitive to any suggestion that he should lose weight, no matter how lovingly you intend it. However, his overweight or obesity may worry you for legitimate health reasons if you wish him a lengthy, healthy life. 

couple exercising to lose weight

How Do You Get Your Husband To Lose Weight? without hurting his feeling? Keep in mind losing weight is often harder for men since they don’t see it as a priority. Also, men may not notice small changes as women do. To others, comfort and convenience often take priority over the societal pressures that motivate women.

But good health should be a shared goal for any couple. However, that doesn’t mean you tell him directly or demand he loses weight, as that would cause more harm than good. 

Is it OK to ask my husband to lose weight?

It is not wrong to ask your husband to lose weight, however you need to do it in a safe way without hurting his feeling.

  • Understand Why You Want Him to Lose Weight

Ask yourself why you truly want your husband to lose weight. Is it just for aesthetic reasons or due to social pressures? Or are you genuinely concerned for his health? 

Focusing on his health issues gives you the moral high ground in this discussion. So think through any medical conditions like high blood pressure, joint pain, sleep apnea, and other health risks his weight may be aggravating. Also read: How Do You Talk To someone Who Need To Lose Weight?

Also, consider if your desire comes from a place of wanting to help versus changing him. Any hint that you think he needs to “fix” himself will likely make him defensive. Instead, realize that losing weight is difficult, and you want to support him in achieving better health. 

Focus on the positive changes it could bring to both of your lives by increasing energy, improving intimacy, and sharing a long future together. Coming from a place of caring rather than criticizing will warm your husband to the idea.

  • Have The Conversation’ with him

Carefully choose a moment to broach the topic when your husband is relaxed and receptive. Wait for a time when he doesn’t have the TV on as a distraction and he’s not tired or stressed from work.

Ideally, pick a time in the evening after dinner or on a weekend when you have his undivided attention. Sit down face-to-face so he can see your caring expression. Read: Here: What Does It Mean When You Are Losing Weight In A Relationship?

Spend time thinking through exactly what you want to say and how you’ll phrase it tactfully. Put yourself in his shoes and imagine how certain word choices may sound hurtful or accusatory. Avoid direct commands and weight-shaming language. Focus your speech on concern for his health and well-being, not his appearance.

Start the conversation by reminding your husband why you married him. Share details on what you love about him. Pay genuine compliments about his personality, character, and the little things that attracted you to him.

Remind him that he’s still handsome and attractive to you. This flattery will soften his reaction and make him more receptive to the sensitive topic you must broach. Read: Why Do Some People Struggle To Lose Weight And Others Lose Weight Fast?

Explain that seeing his health struggles worries you. Frame it as a problem you both can tackle together as a team, using “we” statements. Focus on wanting to support him for the benefit of your relationship, not just his body image. Use positive words that show your loving concern, not criticism.

Connect his health and weight loss goals to improving your intimacy and closeness. Mention that becoming healthier and more active could actually bring you even closer physically and emotionally.

Offer to make healthy changes alongside him, as a couple working toward the same objective of a long and fulfilling life together.

How to Encourage My Overweight Husband to Lose Weight

Now that you’ve had an initial, caring conversation with your husband about wanting to support his health goals, here are some practical ways you can encourage him as he works to lose weight.

Though he must ultimately drive this process himself, small changes you make at home can help tip the scales in his favor. With patience and positivity, the following strategies can nurture his weight loss journey in a loving, non-judgmental way:

  • Listen To Understand, Not To Fix

One of the most impactful yet difficult things you can do is learn to simply listen without trying to fix things for your husband. He likely already knows what he needs to do but may benefit from venting his frustrations.

Avoid ticking off advice unless he specifically asks. Active listening, where you feed back what you hear to confirm understanding, can show care and support that empowers him.

  • Stock Up On Healthy Foods

One easy way to encourage a healthier home is by focusing your grocery lists on nutritious options. Avoid sugary treats that may tempt him. Choose healthier foods he generally enjoys – like fruit, whole grains, lean meats, and veggies. Small shifts to your shared pantry and fridge can subtly encourage better choices.

  • Choose Healthier Restaurant Options

When eating out, suggest cuisines and dishes incorporating more veggies and fewer high-calorie condiments. Instead of sharing dessert, order an extra appetizer or side salad to share as an alternative. Read; How To Lose Weight In The Middle Ages?

If your husband wants help deciding, offer suggestions – but if not, avoid pressuring him by ordering differently or commenting on his choices.

  • Prepare More Home Cooked Meals

Cooking for your family more often at home allows you greater control over portion sizes, ingredients, and cooking methods. Make sure to include foods your husband enjoys while keeping them healthier – for example, baked instead of fried chicken.

Serve vegetables and salad with each dinner. Involve your husband in meal planning and preparation to foster a sense of teamwork and shared goals.

  • Encourage Increased Fitness

If your husband begins an exercise routine, offer encouragement and support. Join him when possible to keep him motivated. Look for small ways to incorporate more movement into your daily lives, like parking further away, taking the stairs, or walking after dinner. Even doing chores together can increase activity levels. Focus your praise on his efforts, not just results.

  • Move The Focus Away From The Scale Numbers

Your husband’s self-worth should not be tied to a number on a scale. Instead of immediately asking about weight loss, inquire how he’s feeling and if he has more energy. If he expresses frustration over the scale, simply listen and reassure him that consistency matters more than the number. Celebrate his perseverance, healthy choices, and patience when the numbers drop – not just the pounds.

  • Find Activities You Can Do As A Couple

Engaging in physical activities together to motivate and support each other. Choose workouts you can both enjoy, like going for long walks, hiking on weekends, dancing in your living room, swimming at the gym, or cycling together. Shared experiences reinforce the importance of health and fitness for your relationship.

  • Set Goals, Track Progress, and Give Rewards

Once your husband starts losing weight, setting small goals and marking milestones can motivate him. Track progress through progress pictures, weigh-ins, or measuring body parts.

Celebrate each achievement, no matter how minor, with a non-food reward like a massage, new workout gear, or date night. Positive reinforcement strengthens determination.

  • Encourage Him To Drink Less

Alcohol is high in calories with no nutritional value, so cutting back can seriously aid weight loss. While you can’t force your husband to drink less, you can set a good example by ordering water or one drink when socializing. Avoid keeping alcohol stocked at home as much as possible. Gently suggesting healthier alternatives shows care for his goals.

  • Reconnect With Your Partner

Weight loss journeys can strain couples as habits and lifestyles shift. Prioritizing time for the two of you without focusing on food or fitness can help. Additionally, studies show boredom encourages overeating. 

Go on a date night, share an activity you both enjoy or simply talk. Reminding your partner that you’re in this together – and that you love them for far more than their weight – provides needed support. Try to have these moments more often. 


Losing weight is hard for anyone, especially men. Showing love and concern for your husband’s health non-judgmentally is key. Focus on listening, making healthy home changes together, and encouraging him through rewards and shared activities. Above all, remind him of your connection that goes beyond weight or appearances.

Medical Discalimer: The information provided here On Geeks Health website is for general informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. If you have or suspect a medical problem, promptly contact your healthcare provider. Reliance on any information in this response is solely at your own risk.
Vanessa Roberts
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